Gotta Share

Me with my old dance partner and close friend

Lookie lookie! Here I am sitting on "my" bench at city beach with one of my best friends from high school who I have not seen in probably 40 years. Charlie and I did the usual losing track of one another as marriages and jobs and moves flung us apart. Facebook brought us back together quite awhile ago now, and he gave me some advance notice that he'd be in the area this week, hoping we could find a time when we could get together. I didn't say anything about my shoulder issues, but have worriedly eyed the calendar and my progress, hoping I'd be better enough to sit through a lunch. I am and I did, and we even spent a few hours enjoying a perfect day for taking in the lake and various activities upon it. Charlie said he could easily fill the whole card in his serious camera taking pictures of the boats and paddle boarders and mountains. Thank you smoke for not spoiling this moment!

Mr. English handing out pop during a break

The details are a bit hazy but I'm thinking Charlie and I got to know each other through the square dance group I joined when I was in junior high school. In fact, the tight group of friends that saw me through my high school days when the various cliques in my class didn't include me was forged out of those weekly dances at Mr. English's Hayloft, a space above his detached garage that he transformed with perfectly sanded and waxed wood floors, rustic beams and barn-like decorations into a place to teach not only square dancing but couples dances like waltzes and tangos and polkas and a basic two-step, and for utter fun, a Mexican Hat Dance. He'd put on a record and call the squares, demo steps for both guys and gals, and on rare occasions his wife would come up and they'd glide across the floor like nothing we'd seen, or could do ourselves. In their younger days they'd travel to events and I suspect, perhaps even competed. All I know is that it was such a treat to dance with him, that perfect frame, firm lead and gliding footwork whisking one around the room.

Of course, the guys didn't sit with us during break

And that was the way Charlie was as well. He carried more weight than most of the boys which might make you think he'd be a plodder. But he was surprisingly light on his feet and nary a stumble (or trod on partner's toe - I can't say the same of me). I was so very much in the habit of having to lead the other boys around the dance floor and count out the steps to them that Charlie often had to stop after a few steps, give me a shake and say, "Stop Leading!" Oh yeah, no leading necessary with him.

John, another of our motley crew, with the resident owl

I have so few photos of us in the Hayloft, and none, I realize, of Charlie except one where he is mostly hidden. He has recently shared some of his photos with me, the black and white ones here, and between his and mine, you can get the flavor of the place and how much fun we had there.

Yeah, that's me having a gay old time!

Besides his twinkle toes, the other thing I remember most of Charlie was the night outside the Hayloft when I was crying on his shoulder about my insecurities and feeling like I wasn't liked (you know, teenage angst). Again, that firm taking hold of me and giving me a shake, then pinning me with his eyes and firmly telling me to stop short changing myself, followed up by a recitation of all the things he thought good, maybe even superior about me when compared to those people I so wanted to be accepted by, ending with a stern don't ever forget this. Sometimes a girl needs a wake-up call from someone she respects, and he gave me mine. Bear in mind, Charlie and I never had any romantic connections, just a very good friendship. The kind that when one summer after we had both graduated and found ourselves back home and between boyfriend/girlfriend, he called me up and said, "I'm not asking you out on a date. I don't want to "go steady" with you. I'd just like someone to do things with this summer, go to the movies with, that sort of thing. What do you say?" I said yes, and we had such fun and such good talks that summer.

David, my other favorite dance partner and close friend, no longer with us.

And so, there we sat at the beach, catching up on the years, pooling what we knew about the current whereabouts and situations of those we square danced with and that inner circle of close friends, some a year ahead of me, some a year behind, who spent many a Friday or Saturday night together besides our square dance nights, me being reminded why I like him so much and that those reasons still hold. Just an easy person to be with still, an easy comfort between us even after all these years. I wished he could waltz me around the floor one more time but time has taken its toll and his body would protest, he sadly admits. Makes me twice as glad he made the effort to come see me. Facebook is better than nothing, but nothing beats reuniting face to face.

Janet and me with the public marina in the background

Oh, by the way, he ended up marrying the younger sister of a gal that also ran with our group. I didn't have a lot of contact with Janet back in those days so it was a true delight to spend time with her too and get to know her better. After all, she knows all the dirt about our motley crew! 

Charlie and me 1969